


The Way Down

by AppleCiderr



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Bipolar Disorder, Denial, Depressed Orihara Izaya, Depression, Domestic Violence, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Gaslighting, M/M, Physical Abuse, Protective Shizuo Heiwajima, Self-Esteem Issues, The Author Regrets Everything, Yakuza
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-15
Updated: 2017-09-15
Packaged: 2018-12-30 03:11:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12099447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AppleCiderr/pseuds/AppleCiderr
Summary: Izaya has been trapped in an abusive relationship for years, completely controlled, and completely lost as to what his feelings truly are. With no way out, he continues to suffer, until certain people start to take notice.His facade is strong, but it's starting to crumble. Izaya's been trapped for so long, so deep he can no longer see the light.  Can he be saved before he loses his grip on the surface, or has he already drowned?





	The Way Down

He loves me, I know he does.

 

We’ve been together for so long, we’ve been dedicated for so long.

 

I’ve given everything to him.

 

He’s stayed with me, even though I’m not worth his time.

 

I know that because he told me

 

I know it’s true because he told me.

 

He loves me, so I know it’s true

 

He means well.. I know he does

 

He raises his hand above his head

 

But it’s because I deserve it

 

I know that because he told me. 

 

He may leave for a long time, but he always comes back

 

Sometimes he just needs a break from my incompetence.

 

But I try so hard..

 

I listen to what he says

 

I follow his orders

 

I love him despite my own faults

 

Why is it never enough?

 

Is it because I’m not good enough?

 

That’s what he told me..

 

…

 

...

It hurts a lot, but I deserve it.

 

I should be better for him

 

I’m nothing compared to him

 

I don’t deserve him, I don’t deserve anything

 

I don’t deserve to be alive

 

I’m a demon who should just die, the world would be so much better.

 

I know that because he told me.

 

I know it sounds bad.. But he means well

 

He has to..

 

HE HAS TO!

 

..

 

..

 

…

 

He loves me.. He _ has _ to.

 

..

 

..

 

..

 

Because I can’t survive without him..


End file.
